how will I make it?

This post is jumping ahead of the other chapters. my computer crashed and I lost all previous material for posts good job that I printed them out on paper I will continue to add them in the order that I recorded them because the chronological history is important in monitoring how I grow in this journey. Its 4.45a Tuesday morning I'm not feeling motivated, the burden of my debts weigh heavy on me.The new job is not working out well financially the holidays are approaching and I am in clear danger of losing my home to eviction and my truck to a loan company. I was just here 30 days ago I did write about it but that entry is now lost due to computer crash I did make it through the last crisis but another returns to test me in these days. what did I learn from the last time ? well first of all I made it through by taking action and preparing all the paperwork for the loans I took out and remained in a state of gratefulness for the fact that I got through, but as this next challenge approaches I feel once again in such a difficult place all I have in my life is liability and no assets I have a job but it does not pay enough to cover all of my living expenses and bills I spent today taking care of a red letter bill due for cut off .managed to keep the gas on, need hot water you know .I friend met me at 7.00a yesterday and took out a $400 loan for me so that I could cover my rent but now I need another $300 to take care of the interest for the truck loan and to get to next paycheck two weeks from now. I'm so exhausted from doing this process every 30 days I pray for some miracle to change my financial life but alas I can only ask for strength and guidance from my higher power. Tomorrow will be stressful I hope to take out 2 more loans in order to make it until next paycheck I will not stop searching for new investment opportunities I just need a good amount of investment capital so that I can start doing business for now its one day at a time. If I can get through today I can probably get through tomorrow, as the dawn approaches I am anxious to see how will I make it?.